When most people think of skateboarding, their first thoughts are usually something along the lines of misfit teens, punk rock, or maybe even guys like Tony Hawk. What they don’t think about, is just how amazing skateboarding is for kids who need occupational therapy. Kids like Everett, who are on the autism spectrum. Kids like Finn, who need help with impulse control. So today I’m going to highlight the awesome benefits of skateboarding for kids with special needs.

Surprising Benefits of Skateboarding

From the time children with autism are toddlers, they are placed into Occupational Therapy which is needed to develop motor, proprioceptive, vestibular skills and more. Skateboarding offers nearly every component of Occupational Therapy, which is why many of these children “crave” to skateboard. It stimulates parts of their brain that trigger focus, hand-eye coordination, and more. Here are just a few of the health benefits:

• Coordination – Skateboarding improves hand, eye, leg and feet coordination. When skateboarding, you need to alter your movements so you skate smoothly and accurately.
• Pain Tolerance – Other sports improve your pain tolerance, but learning how to skateboard includes constantly falling, tripping, cutting your knees and elbows, etc. Believe it or not, this helps to improve your tolerance and build up resilience.
• Stress Relief – Stresses consume people, even kids, all the time. Skateboarding is an avenue to relieve some of those stresses or frustrations.
• Precision – Skateboarding takes a lot of precision to master. You are constantly adjusting weight from one direction to another, switching your speed, and, when good enough, perfecting tricks.
• Reflexes – This one ties together with coordination. When falling or stopping quickly, you need to have quick reflexes to brace yourself or prevent a collision from happening. You learn quickly that running into a railing is not ideal.
• Patience/Behavior Management– Skateboarding, like other sports, requires an immense amount of patience. You will not be the next Tony Hawk after your first time on the board. Falling countless times, missing that tricky bend, and hitting that awesome trick will test your patience time after time. When a skateboarder is having a bad day, annoyed with the world, feels like he could punch through a brick wall what does he do? He skateboards. Same as kids with autism, when their impulse control is almost lost, their anxiety is through the roof, and the screaming and crying is about to begin, break out the skateboard and you’ll find that it helps them work through their current behaviors.
• Social Development- skateboarding allows those who struggle with normal social interaction interact with peers on the level the individual feels most comfortable with.

Skateboarding offers many components similar to occupational therapy such as focusing on motor, vestibular and proprioceptive skills. Saturday skateboarding lessons are quickly becoming one of the boys favorite things to do. Both boys have a weak core and crave high impact activities. Everett has poor motor planning and balance issues, while Finn has poor impulse control and anger issues. Skateboarding is helping tremendously with both. Learning self/impulse control and behavior management is a huge part in why I decided to start the boys with lessons. And perhaps, most importantly, it’s also pretty freaking fun!

Skateboarding has had such a amazing impact on kids with autism that there are several nonprofits that have been created to help connect and introduce skateboarding to those the spectrum. There are even studies that have popped up specifically to research the correlation of brain activity and heart rate between autism and skateboarding. It’s even been approved as an acceptable form of occupational therapy in several states.

Hopefully, with these studies and nonprofits, skateboarding will no longer be looked at as a rebellious pasttime by those who don’t understand it and more funding would be available for using skateboarding as a therapy rather that funding just another information autism organization out there.

I know that right now, the boys have found an outlet they both love and I couldn’t be happier with their awesome teacher and their continued progress. I hope they continue to find joy in skateboarding and that the benefits continue to carryover into other aspects of their lives.

The post Skateboarding On The Spectrum appeared first on Not So SuperMom VS Society.

Without fail, multiple times a month, someone will claim Everett’s autism is caused by something outlandish. Usually, it’s the age old, well debunked, vaccine argument.

Some of the things I’ve been “informed” of, pique my interest enough for a Google search, and some are just so out there that it leaves me scratching my head.

The thing is, I’m no longer looking for a cause. I’ve accepted and embraced Everett’s diagnosis. While Everett may be on the spectrum, it isn’t his defining feature. So when someone tries to sell me some “miracle cure” or tell me how Everett “became” Autistic, frankly I don’t care.

They don’t understand that I feel like his diagnosis makes him stronger. That it shows me so many new aspects of the world I never would have noticed before. It makes our family better. Do we struggle? Yes- without a doubt. It can be isolating and lonely. I’m often confused and second guessing myself. However, it challenges us in good ways too.

Obviously, I hate watching Everett struggle, and our pocketbook doesn’t love all the costs associated with an autism diagnosis, but the way his mind processes things is beautiful. So when I hear these outlandish claims, I’ve learned to tune them out. Sometimes I’ll post funny tees with scientifically accurate comebacks, usually though, I just shake my head and move on.

Did You Know….?

Now for the fun part. I’ve compiled a list that includes some of the more crazy things people have claimed are the cause/cure for Autism.

DISCLOSURE THESE ARE ALL FALSE- PLEASE DO NOT BELIEVE OR TRY ANY OF THESE CURES!

• Laundry detergent. Yep. Good old Tide. The cure? Strip all clothes, then hand wash with vinegar, baking soda, & essential oils. Leave in sun to dry. After a few months all autistic related traits will magically vanish.
• Pesticides. Cure? Only feed him food that you can grow yourself or purchase from a local farm that doesn’t use pesticides. Limit meat consumption.
• Worms… or rather lack of. Yep. You read that right. The claim is that modern humans lead too healthy of a lifestyle, (that’s a first), and it’s killed the parasitic worms that kept our ancestors healthy. Hence why we are seeing an increase in modern-day ills.
• Saying Autism. I said the word “autism” in front of Everett and caused it.
• Pollutants. Multiple people have to told me I either live too close to an interstate or in too polluted areas.
• Cellphone Towers. Chem trails. The internet. Come on people, take off your tinfoil hats!
• God. Yep. Someone once told me that God made people autistic to teach other people compassion. Another said it was God’s punishment for leaving the church.
• Demons. Autism isn’t real, those behaviors are actually a sign of demonic possession.
• Endometriosis/Womb Deffects. I shouldn’t have been able to carry a child, and because I forced it with fertility treatments, Everett is now “defective.”
• Finger Length: The length of his fingers predicted his autism. (This one really had me scratching my head).
• Diet, Mental Health & Meds. I didn’t eat enough meat when pregnant. I ate too much meat when pregnant. I didn’t eat enough folic acid. Also in this same vein, my “toxic gut.” Taking antibiotics during pregnancy. Being depressed while pregnant.
• Hot Tubs: someone seriously asked me if I got into a hot tub when I was pregnant, because if I did, the heat “killed his genes” that prevent autism.
• Lyme Disease: I was asked if I tried getting Everett treatment for Lyme Disease, because they read somewhere that it also cured autism. (Newsflash: it doesn’t)
• Parents: I spoiled him too much, I didn’t spoil him enough. I was too caring. I wasn’t caring enough. We make too much money. We don’t make enough.
• Pregnancy: I got pregnant again, (with Finn), and my pregnancy hormones triggered a change in Everett.
• Wishing: I wanted my child to have a “trendy” diagnosis, so I sent autistic intentions towards him and he absorbed them.
• Air Conditioning: I kept the air conditioning too high when I was pregnant.
• And finally vaccines. This one deserves its own section.

VACCINES DON’T CAUSE AUTISM

I wrote a WHOLE BLOG about this when I was attacked by someone who believed this last fall (you can read it here). Here is just a small excerpt:

There is ZERO scientific evidence that vaccines cause autism. The one doctor, or should I say former doctor, that made this claim lost his license for his false allegations. Vaccines, in general, are the safest and most cost effective preventative treatment one can get. Also, what about the children with autism, seizures, and other horrible childhood illnesses that have never had a vaccine? What about the millions of people who have had vaccinations and have had no complications? Yes vaccine injuries have occurred, but it’s the minority, not the majority. And I repeat there is ZERO medical based evidence that vaccines cause autism!

I hope you got a few laughs in- I know I did! Autism isn’t caused by any of these things and autism isn’t something that needs “cured.” It simply is. It’s a part of our lives, but it isn’t our life. We are happy. We are healthy. Everett is just that, Everett. We don’t need or want a miracle cure, we just want him to be the amazing person he was made to be.

The post Your Child is Autistic Because… appeared first on Not So SuperMom VS Society.

It’s nice to have another mom to talk to, especially a local one, who has a child with similar issues the same age. The thing is, even though our boys have similar issues, they deal with them different ways. Hence why Autism is called a spectrum.

This year, while I decided Everett actually needed to be in school to thrive, Marjorie made the opposite decision. I felt like it’s a decision a lot of Autism Moms are faced with, even when there isn’t a global pandemic, and I loved her reasoning behind it. I invited her to write a post for the NSSM blog to help out other mothers in a similar situation. I hope you love it as much as I did!

Buckling In: Why I Chose to
Homeschool My Neurodivergent Child

It started with a preschool teacher’s accusatory finger pointed toward my face and ended with me in tears so heavy I could barely catch my breath. Was it all my fault? I felt like an amateur and a failure as a parent.

We moved from Ohio to Alabama only two months prior. This wasn’t our first cross-country move, but it was certainly the hardest on our 5-year-old son, Connor. Connor is on the autism spectrum, and while he has low-support needs, changes as big as moving to a new state can be incredibly difficult for him. He has “invisible” struggles that are, as I’ve learned, hard for others—even educators—to understand.

We were able to get him a last-minute spot in a public preschool program here in our current nook of greater Birmingham. Connor did very well during his 4-hour per day program—just as he did in Ohio, just as I expected. But likewise, just like in Ohio, he was becoming overloaded due to the complicated expectations of school (this isn’t something we were fully able to grasp at the time, however).

Each afternoon when I would pick him up from preschool, he fell apart. He would hold it together in school, and then when I arrived at pick-up, he would immediately let that composure go. It would, on some days, be a momentous struggle to get him buckled in his car seat. He would kick and run around. He would sometimes throw fits and yell. By this point, I was normally sweating with rising anxiety.

When we would arrive at home a short one-minute drive later, he would let it all go. And I mean all of it. He was back in his safe space. At this time, after school each day, he was having legitimate meltdowns—the kind that depleted all of the energy he had and all of the energy I had. While the meltdowns eventually ended each day, he was often left in a very irritable state for nearly the rest of each evening. He would continuously grab and pull things at home and in public in order to gain input to calm himself. He was easily triggered by seemingly small occurrences. My husband and I were both struggling to handle these behaviors and struggling to find an answer. We weren’t perfect, but we were absolutely trying.

On that day the teacher put her finger in my face, I was already close to my mental breaking point. I politely asked her if she had noticed Connor’s struggles to get into his car seat and I asked her if she had any suggestions to help. To my surprise, she said to me, finger pointed toward my face: “I’m probably going to say this the wrong way, but that’s on you.” I was told that I simply needed “clearer boundaries” for him. She did not see him as struggling because she was blinded by his ability to mask in school.

That might not sound like the most terrible thing to hear, but in that moment, it felt like a huge slap in the face. I was a struggling parent and simply asked for advice. Even after I tried explaining during an IEP meeting what I saw happening (no, clear instructions and a social story were NOT working, per her suggestions), she seemed to completely disregard those thoughts.

The consideration that maybe there was something more going on that she couldn’t see was obviously not something that would be entertained during this meeting. I started to question if I could continue to participate in IEP meetings and continue to have teachers misunderstand me and my child.

Unfortunately, kids like Connor are often misunderstood. Behaving in school and academically advanced? Clearly his after-school behavior is simply a result of a lack of parental boundaries.

Oddly enough, we saw a psychologist during this time period and he was able to witness the meltdowns and behaviors I was seeing. Maybe teachers didn’t believe me, but he saw it. He said, “Marjorie, I need you to know that this is not parenting related. He is struggling with anxiety and impulsivity and overload. This is nothing you are responsible for. I’m glad I got to see it so I can get the full picture.”

“Marjorie, I need you to know that this is not parenting related. He is struggling with anxiety and impulsivity and overload. This is nothing you are responsible for. I’m glad I got to see it so I can get the full picture.”

THIS.

THIS lifted me away from anger. I think I called everyone I knew that day to tell them how validated I felt. I wasn’t a failure. I had a kid who was struggling and now it was time to “buckle in” and figure out how to drive all over again.

Shortly after, to the shock of everyone around the world, covid-19 happened. And our worlds changed drastically. While many others were struggling, we were, for the first time in years, finding peace and calm and happiness.

This is not to say everything was immediately perfect. But once school abruptly ended, we were able to study our son more closely. We started to figure out his triggers, his limits, and what was overstimulating for him. We noticed that his moods were getting better. He wasn’t as irritable or as easily frustrated. I can’t say it was all due to school, but that was certainly a huge part of his life that had been taken away completely. It only made sense.

We’re now starting to see and understand that Connor “masks” in some situations like school and then lets go of that mask when he’s no longer forced in that situation, or when he just can’t take it anymore. We have since witnessed this in other circumstances (after long outings or especially overwhelming environments like restaurants or chaotic playgrounds, for instance).

As the weeks went by, I was able to create the type of peaceful routines I noticed that he needed. I utilized some strategies taught to me in OT. When I noticed him becoming overloaded, I pumped the brakes and allowed him to do things like use his iPad, draw, use materials like play-doh, and just generally unwind. It was starting to work. My husband and I were in true disbelief. He hadn’t had a single meltdown in weeks. He was listening better. He was behaving better. He was connecting more than ever before with his sister and with us.

When it came time to make a decision about homeschooling, we decided it was worth giving a shot. After all, at the time it didn’t seem like schools would be a safe place anyway, and I knew the addition of wearing masks would be even more overwhelming for Connor. Not to mention going from a 4-hour preschool day to a 7-hour Kindergarten day.

I consider myself to be a very quietly stubborn person—as in you might not realize how much I will fight or push or work to make something I care about happen. And that’s exactly what I did when it came to homeschooling. I researched and learned along the way. I ended up switching curriculums just two months in, because I found one that better met my son’s needs. I fiddled around with schedules and observed how much time my son could spend learning each subject before needing a sensory break. I was able to fully advance him a grade level (and sometimes more depending on the subject). As a child who is academically strong, he was both struggling in school and not working at his ability levels.

Talk about a less-than-ideal situation.

Now, he gets to work exactly where he’s at and even pursue topics of interest that are not covered in kindergarten—he loves studying countries, cells, computer animation, you name it! He also has more time to participate in wonderful social skills groups, martial arts (which is proving to be an awesome outlet for him), and I am able to help guide and process social interactions with him. For the first time in years, I can take deep breaths again.

I can honestly say that, right now, I rarely have moments where I sit and cry because I’m so overwhelmed and feeling hopeless. And goodness, my child really seems like a happy child, which is all I’ve ever wanted for him. He really isn’t having meltdowns anymore, like, at all. Sure, he certainly doesn’t always behave or listen, he still gets overloaded and irritable sometimes. Life isn’t perfect, and I’m still learning as we go.) But, it’s been five months since schools shut down in March and we’ve only had a few meltdowns here and there. He used to have them everyday, sometimes multiple times a day. His general mood is so much calmer and happier. He follows directions well and even volunteers to help around the house. He does really kind things for everyone in his family, and because he’s happy, we can see how that impacts our entire family. We are all happier. There is a sense of peacefulness in our home that we’ve never experienced. And I’m no longer as anxious when I take him to parks or around other kids. He’s making a lot of progress. I think because we are now in this calmer place, we’ve been able to actually focus on skills like socializing and good behavior.

Before, it just felt like getting through the day was all we could do. I know new challenges may arise (actually, undoubtedly, they will), but I’m ready for them. And through this experience and transition to homeschooling, I’ve learned that I have the tools and ability to figure it out. I have more trust and confidence in myself as a parent. Even on days I feel discouraged, I remind myself that I love my child more than anyone on this planet, and that has to be enough. I will always do what’s best for him and tweak our situation and environment as needed.

Homeschooling was never something I thought I’d do. But I was given a child who is a little “different” and is honestly more amazing than I can put into words. The way his brain works astonishes me. That may mean that he doesn’t fit neatly into the box others expect him to fit into, but that’s the beauty of homeschooling—he doesn’t have to be in a box. Actually, his space and capacity to learn is now wide open. I cannot say with certainty that we will homeschool forever. I have no idea what the future holds.

I do know that this is absolutely working for now. Even on days we have setbacks, it’s still so much better. Homeschooling I’m sure will not or does not work for all neurodivergent children, but I do know that it works for some. (Sidenote: there are numerous Facebook groups just for autism and homeschooling!)

Oh, and in case you’re wondering, Connor now gets in his car seat for me with no issues. He buckles himself in and it’s no longer a stressful experience. I think it’s safe to say it took a whole lot more than clearer boundaries and a social story attached to the back of my seat.

Daily schedule (times vary by the day, but this is a “typical day”)
7-8 am: get dressed (we get dressed even on days we stay home!), breakfast, free play
8-930 am: our typical “school hours” where we cover core subjects, including ELA, math, and handwriting (we use “The Good & The Beautiful” curriculums, primarily). I also have activities from “The Peaceful Preschool” for my 3-year-old daughter.
9:30-10 am: snack time
10-12 pm: active time – we like (have to!) to get out of the house, so usually this means a playground, a visit to the science center, a playdate with friends, etc.
12 pm: lunch out or at home
1 pm: usually our “down time,” which can mean anything from a little bit of iPad time, sensory bin play, doodling with art supplies, etc.
2 pm: This is when we often do other subjects, like science and social studies. We do science experiments (a favorite!), read books on social studies topics, art projects, etc.
3-4 pm: I try to cook most days and include the kids! So we are typically getting things prepped and cooked for dinner at this time.
4-5 pm: Connor just started taking martial arts classes, so usually this is the time we are heading there or participating in martial arts

The post Living Life On The Spectrum, Homeschool Edition appeared first on Not So SuperMom VS Society.

Today we brought out more fun painting projects! I wanted to have today’s painting projects be a little less messy than our rock painting day, so I found some easy to make and clean up painting projects.

I think now that we are schooling at home, I really need to invest in a drop cloth! The kids reallllly love painting and Finn definitely takes a “all hands on deck” approach.

These 2 are paints are fun to make. The jelly bean one is taste safe, so it makes a great choice for littles who like to stick everything in their mouths. It’s also pretty neat for older kids, due to the fact that process to make it is pretty cool!

The shaving cream one is pretty neat because you can add a lot of fun elements to it and you are supposed to use your fingers to paint it. It makes a great sensory experience for the kids, plus we turned the leftover shaving cream into a sensory bin (check tomorrow’s blog for that activity!).

Paint Ingredients & Instructions

Shaving Cream Paint

Steps:

1. Squeeze out a few dollops of plain shaving cream, making separate piles. I used a paper plate as a palette. This is a fun way for your child to practice their fine motor skills and self-control. If they start getting a little crazy with the cream, encourage them to take control of their own actions. 
2. Mix the paint. Drip a drop or two of food coloring into each pile. If you only have a few colors, blend a drop of each to make new ones. The primary colors (red, yellow and blue) combine to make purple, orange and green. Keep in mind, food coloring is extremely messy. It will stain clothes and may temporarily stain your child’s hands. The more it mixes in with the shaving cream, the lighter it will become. If you’re concerned about staining, using a plastic spoon or a craft stick to mix the food coloring until it lightens up enough for your child to touch it. 
3. Add some glitter. This really makes the paint fun, however, as I’m sure you’re aware, glitter gets EVERYWHERE.
4. For smaller children, use a marker to draw a Easter egg/ bunny on their paper. Have them paint it. For older kids, have them create their own!
5. Ask them questions while they paint. Have them talk about their observations. What happens as the paint dries? What colors mix? Etc.

Jelly Bean Paint

Steps:

This painting craft starts with a fun candy science experiment. This experiment is super simple and relies purely on observation skills. The boys already had a pretty good idea of what was going to happen after we did our skittles candy rainbow a couple weeks ago.

Experiment Steps:

1. Ask your children “What do you think will happen to these jelly beans when they soak in water?”
2. Make as many cups/bowls as you have jelly bean colors and fill them with around 1 cup of water. I found warm water worked the fastest. (For further experimentation, you can use other liquids, such as vinegar, Sprite, etc, we used water so we could transform ours into paint)
   • Pro-tip: if you plan on making paint, use a muffin tin and you’ll automatically have an easy to use paint pallet!
3. Place 8-10 jelly beans in each cup.
4. Check the jelly beans every hour until there isn’t any more color left on the beans. Have them note the changes each hour. This process takes around 30min-1 hour.
5. Once the jelly bean color has dissolved into the water, remove the beans from the water and save the water for later. (Note the jelly beans will still have a light color to them)
6. Have them feel the jelly beans and observe their new texture. Have them smell it. Have them taste the jelly bean and see if it still tastes the same. Ask them questions about why and how this experiment turned out.

Once your experiment is over use the colored water that you saved to make fun taste-safe paint!

Paint & Brush Steps:

1. Take your jelly bean water and add around 1/3 cups worth of flour to the liquid. Add as much flour to the mixture as you need to make a nice semi-thick paste. You want it to be smooth enough to easily paint, but not too runny. If it’s too runny the paint won’t stick well.
2. For more vibrant color, add a couple drops of food coloring to your mixture and stir it up.
3. Make your “cottontail” paintbrushes by taking a cotton ball and grabbing it with your clothespins. Full disclosure- while this brush is super cute for Easter crafts, it does absorb a lot of the paint and gets warped pretty quickly.
4. Have fun! Paint Easter designs or something of your own design. The paint will be a little gritty from the residual sugar in the water and it gives the paint a cool texture!

Did you try one of our crafts? Tell us below!

The post Easter Painting Projects appeared first on Not So SuperMom VS Society.

Looking for an awesome stocking stuffer for your favorite sensory seeking kiddo? Look no further! I’ve been trying out some of the coolest products with Everett this season, and I’d love to share my favorites with you. Too late to get a stocking stuffer this year? These also make great anytime gifts for those on a budget!

The Importance of Sensory Play

From birth through to early childhood, children use their senses to explore and try to make sense of the world around them. They do this by touching, tasting, smelling, seeing, moving and hearing.
Children and even adults learn best and retain the most information when they engage their senses. Many of our favorite memories are associated with one or more of our senses: for instance, the smell of a summer night campfire or a song you memorized the lyrics to with a childhood friend. Now, when your nostrils and eardrums are stimulated with those familiar smells and sounds respectively, your brain triggers a flashback memory to those special times.
Providing opportunities for children to actively use their senses as they explore their world through ‘sensory play’ is crucial to brain development – it helps to build nerve connections in the brain’s pathways.
This leads to a child’s ability to complete more complex learning tasks and supports cognitive growth, language development, gross motor skills, social interaction and problem solving skills.

We often talk about the five senses. These are:

Taste – the stimulation that comes when our taste receptors react to chemicals in our mouth.
Touch – the stimulation that comes from touch receptors in our skin that react to pressure, heat/cold, or vibration.
Smell – the stimulation of chemical receptors in the upper airways (nose).
Sight – the stimulation of light receptors in our eyes, which our brains then interpret into visual images.
Hearing – the reception of sound, via mechanics in our inner ear.
However there are two others we commonly miss:

Body awareness (also known as proprioception) – the feedback our brains receive from stretch receptors in our muscles and pressure receptors in joints which enable us to gain a sense where our bodies are in space.
Balance – the stimulation of the vestibular system of the inner ear to tell us our body position in relation to gravity.

What is sensory play? 

Sensory play includes any activity that stimulates your young child’s senses: touch, smell, taste, movement, balance, sight and hearing.
Sensory activities facilitate exploration and naturally encourage children to use scientific processes while they play, create, investigate and explore. The sensory activities allow children to refine their thresholds for different sensory information helping their brain to create stronger connections to process and respond to sensory information.

Crazy Aaron’s Thinking Putty

Crazy Aaron’s Thinking Putty is a household staple here. Their putty is not only gorgeous to look at, they also make types that have cool features, such as black light reactive, scented, and magnetic. They also never dry out! #win! Everett loves making cool projects from it (such as the solar system above), and use it to practice letters and numbers.

Sensory Sack & Stretchy Dino Cape

If you’ve followed us for awhile, you know I’m a huge fan of Fun & Function. I have a few favorites that made this list, starting with their Stretchy Dino Cape and Crawl & Calm Resistance Tunnel. These are both lightweight and provide endless opportunities. Everett loves using them for dress up play, yoga, and just hiding when the outside world becomes too much. With them being so lightweight, it’s easy to pack in a go bag or even keep in the car.

Zimplikids Slime & Gellibaff

Zimplikids Slime & Gellibaff are super fun for those kids who love the extra tactile sensations of slime. We love making cool Kmart PlayTray activites, and Zimplikids makes it super easy to give them tactile stimuli while having a blast. The image above is a combination of slime and Gellibaff that we made into a fun holiday themed playtray. When the older boys were done digging around, I added dinos for Finn. Both boys enjoy a good game of playtray hide and seek. There are seriously so many fun ways to use this!

Ark Therapeutic Chews

Ark Therapeutic is such a great option for your sensory kiddos that crave oral input. These chews have been such a lifesaver for us this school year. They are helping Everett concentrate and keep his hands to himself, and helping Finn to stop biting his peers. I also love their Z-Vibe. The Z-Vibe helped Everett immensely with feeding, and just calming in general. They are also extremely well priced!

Glitter Balls

Glitter balls can be used so many ways. We like using them in obstacle courses and as an alternative to bean bags with the Give a Flip board. They are pretty to look at, light up, and really help out with improving motor skills. Finn enjoys these more than Everett, however, both boys love them!

Legacy Learning Academy

Legacy Learning Academy has too many amazing things to just pick one. They literally have something for every price & age range. The owner is a former teacher and specializes in making custom learning oriented toys and guides. Her items are all top notch and help with everything from fine motor skills to gross motor skills to just about anything your kiddos might need. They also make wooden toys, so it’s a great addition for those of you taking the Montessori/ Waldorf route.

Looking for other awesome gifts? Fun and Function created an awesome holiday gift guide that has a lot of things we love on it!

Happy holidays!

The post Budget Friendly Sensory Gifts appeared first on Not So SuperMom VS Society.

Recently, I experienced my first real taste of anti-vax cyber bullying. She essentially accused me of causing Everett’s autism.

And she didn’t stop there. So tonight, I’d like to address her vitriol with a few rebuttals. Unfortunately, I wasn’t truly able to respond the way I wanted to under her comments. She chose a post that is currently being promoted by an amazing company I’m working with. Instead, I turned to my support groups. I asked for advice and virtual hugs, and they didn’t let me down. Some of my fellow moms became keyboard warriors in my honor. Thank you again for being so kind. Their kind words and support gave me the confidence and desire to write this rebuttal. I will post segments of screenshots below and my responses. She had a long rant, so buckle your seatbelts and grab some popcorn for this wild ride!

Vaccine Knowledge

Shockingly yes, I can! I actually could list more if you’d like! Sorbitol, sodium phosphate, sucrose, sodium chloride, gelatin, and many many more based on which vaccine you’re getting. I know some of the ingredients may be controversial, but they are given in such small doses that it’s safe for the majority of the population. Believe it or not, I actually researched vaccines, vaccination schedules, and side effects thoroughly. My best friend actually kind of falls into the anti-vaccine camp, shocking I know. However, she provided me with a ton of her research and points of view. I took alllll of that into consideration, as well as the information I found, and advice from medical professionals. I decided that vaccines were right for us. Initially, I did a delayed schedule for Everett to make sure he didn’t have negative side effects or reactions, but other than a little crankiness, he did just fine! I’m happy to trust those who have actual medical degrees with giving my children vaccinations. I still look over each vaccine, side effects, and schedule, but so far, the doctors recommendations have been spot on.

Vaccines Cause Autism

Can we please, for the love of God, stop beating this dead horse?

VACCINES DO NOT CAUSE AUTISM.

There is ZERO scientific evidence that vaccines cause autism. The one doctor, or should I say former doctor, that made this claim lost his license for his false allegations. Vaccines, in general, are the safest and most cost effective preventative treatment one can get. Also, what about the children with autism, seizures, and other horrible childhood illnesses that have never had a vaccine? What about the millions of people who have had vaccinations and have had no complications? Yes vaccine injuries have occurred, but it’s the minority, not the majority. And I repeat there is ZERO medical based evidence that vaccines cause autism!

Autism Isn’t A Trend

First, what type of unkind, cruel hearted person would wish a child to develop seizures? It’s not a special ability, and it’s certainly not a laughing matter. Seizures are scary, unpredictable, and sometimes fatal. Secondly, autism isn’t trendy. I live my life in a constant state of semi-panic over what will come next. Will he hit that child who is crying? Bite the next kid who sings too loudly? Throw his brother off the bed because he doesn’t want him to be in his space? I never know what’s coming and what his future will hold. It’s scary. It’s nerve wracking. Everett isn’t my accessory. He’s a living, breathing, loving, and loud boy. I would LOVE for his life to be easier and for him to not have the challenges autism presents. I didn’t hope for some “trendy” diagnosis, as a matter of fact, I actually mourned what could have been when he was diagnosed. He’s was and still is a beautiful soul.

Oh and by the way, we aren’t on welfare, and having a child with autism doesn’t automatically mean you qualify for welfare or any other supplemental disability benefits. It costs us over 5 grand a year, just for his basic therapy sessions. 5 grand that neither insurance, grants, or government assistance can help with. 5 grand that could be going into our dream home or savings account. That 5 grand is just the tip of the iceberg. Prior to starting pre-k, we also had childcare costs, home therapy tools, and the special foods he would eat. If this is a fad, it’s a pretty damn expensive one.

Scary Anti-Vaxxer Math

Let’s be clear, not only do I hate math, I also suck at it. However, even in my limited capacity, the math here doesn’t add up. Everett & Finn are both recieving the same number of vaccines. That number is NOT 74. Not even close. Quite simply, the whole 72-74 vaccine number is a propaganda tool and scare tactic. Children currently receive 13 vaccines that are designed to protect them from 16 preventable diseases. If you include boosters and a yearly flu vaccine, (which by the way we skip), you’re looking at a max of 54 doses by the age of 18. Several of these vaccines are combined, such as MMR. If you’re trying to figure out where the number in the 70’s came from, it’s from them counting vaccines that are combined (like MMR) individually as well as including the doses a pregnant woman receives. So no, I didn’t notice a jump in vaccines, because there was no radical jump. If you actually look at the math and immunization schedule, you could easily verify this for yourself.

I’m more interested in my kids clothes than injecting them with cancer? Wow. I’ll be honest here, it sounds like you’re just trying to throw shade here because you might be jealous of my kids rad wardrobe. I get it- I’m jealous too! They look hella cute and have cooler clothes than I’ll ever have, but to insinuate that I care more about their appearance than their health is pretty despicable. However, I’m pretty sure that we already established that vaccines also don’t cause cancer, so let’s move on.

It’s 2019, Name-calling Isn’t Okay

Wow. You really went there are dropped the “R” word. Did you perhaps miss the memo that it’s 2019 and using words like that aren’t socially acceptable? I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt, and instead share some awareness with you. Those who are in the special needs community prefer to use respectful people first language. You see, words carry weight. Language affects attitudes and attitudes affect actions. Words, like the “R” word, are what lead to the horror stories you read about. The ones about the unfortunate people in the special needs community being taken advantage of and abused. So please be mindful of your words, you never know who is listening and learning from your misinformation and bigotry. Also, just to remind you, VACCINES DON’T CAUSE AUTISM. They do however cause adults. Here is a handy little infograph for you.

Everett’s Future

Wow. There is so much to unpack here that I almost don’t know where to begin. Let’s start with passing laws to euthanize those with special needs. There are ZERO countries where euthanizing a human being is legal. ZERO. There have been talks about it, but ultimately it is a gross violation of basic human rights. That aside, my child has autism. He isn’t a burden to myself or society. Do we have struggles? Yes. Do we let our struggles define us? No. I’d like you to show me one parent who hasn’t struggled with their child at some point.

Also, it seems like you may not entirely understand what autism is. Autism is a neurological spectrum disorder. A SPECTRUM. Meaning that symptoms and the degree of those symptoms can vary widely from person to person. We’re lucky, Everett is fairly high functioning, but even if he wasn’t, euthanizing wouldn’t be an option. Having autism doesn’t automatically make you more or less intelligent. IQ isn’t a part of autism, it’s part of being a human being. Please don’t make assumptions about a child’s intelligence level without actually knowing the said childs capabilities.

If You Don’t Have Ssomething Nice To Say….

Last, but not least, if you don’t have kind words to say, or if you don’t know the full story, please keep your opinions to yourself. Cyberbullying is no joke. I’m an adult, and it upset me to see such horrible things written in regards to my child and myself. Imagine what our children have to endure in today’s digital age.

Here are a few handy statistics:

It’s scary to consider the weight your words carry, especially digitally, where typical societal norms and decency standards seem to get tossed out the window. Despite your personal biases, try to remember that the person on the other side of the the screen, is a real living being, that’s not so different from yourself.

The post “It’s Your Fault That Your Child Is Autistic” appeared first on Not So SuperMom VS Society.

Today is the last day of Autism Awareness Month and I wanted to end with a bang. I want to talk about invisible disabilities. Autism is just a small slice in the invisible disability world, studies show that 96 percent of people who live with an illness live with an invisible one, and 73 percent of people who live with a severe disability do not use devices like a wheelchair. This means that when you look at them, you wouldn’t know that they’re disabled. Think about how many people you see who are clearly disabled during an average week. Statistically, for every person you’ve seen who looks disabled, you’ve seen at least 4 more who are disabled but don’t look it. Circling back to my soapbox, out of that staggering number, 1 in 59 of children recieve an Autism diagnosis.

They don’t look it.

So how can you tell? Often times you can’t unless you know what to look for, and even then it’s a gamble. It’s best to just be a decent, non-judgmental, and compassionate human being.
According to the American Occupational Therapy Association, sensory processing affects virtually all aspects of a child’s daily life, including motor coordination, school performance, and relationships. A child with sensory processing disorder could have 20/20 vision and perfect hearing, but when he’s in a crowded mall, his brain is not able to manage all of the auditory and visual information he’s receiving through his eyes and ears.

While each kid reacts differently to overstimulation, some will scream or become physically aggressive. What may look like defiance is just a kid doing his best to manage a stressful environment.

The assumption that a lack of discipline indicates a failure by the parent is totally without merit. Often times, people mistake sensory processing issues as discipline issues. No Karen, my child doesn’t need XYZ punishment, he needs calming techniques and resetting. Discipline will not prevent him from being overwhelmed by his environment.

I’m starting to learn that sometimes we just need to leave a playdate when Everett starts having meltdown signs. It sucks for everyone, but the last time we didn’t leave he bit a child. Twice. I’d rather be judged for “indulging ” my child than to have him physically hurt another child. It’s sad, because it seems like this is the beginning of feeling like I’m isolating him from the world.

I’m fortunate to have understanding friends who know Everett often doesn’t mean to be aggressive towards their children, but I get an overwhelming amount of judgment from others.

They see a perfectly normal child, who is aggressive towards their child, who doesn’t respond to normal societal behavior expectations and assume he’s a bad kid. They act shocked that this “horrible” kid is allowed to be at the playground. When I try to explain that he’s learning or on the spectrum I’ve gotten dirty looks.

When I try to calm Everett down I hear their snide remarks about how he’s bad because obviously I don’t know how to discipline him “correctly.” I hear them telling their child to not play with mine.

What I rarely hear are the parents using the moment as a teachable one. They could just as easily teach compassion and inclusion, but they often don’t. They act shocked by his diagnosis. I hear “he looks normal” “but he’s so smart.”

Just because you can’t see it, it doesn’t mean it’s not there

Autism can be invisible. This fact is a double edged sword. It will help my son in life, and it will hurt him at times. The fact that one cannot see his autism spectrum disorder, will at least impact how people will judge him. It will also leave him vulnerable to misunderstanding and unsolicited judgements. So much of how we deal with situations and people is based on our perceptions. Sometimes our perceptions are born from experience, knowledge and our personal ideologies. But sometimes they are born from fear, misunderstanding and ignorance.
When a parent is struggling to find a diagnosis, pay for therapies, or just get through the day with a kid who has an invisible disability, it is not helpful to insist nothing’s wrong because their kid looks so “normal” or that their IQ is so high. What may be intended as a compliment may come as a slap in the face to the parent who has committed precious time, energy, and money to her child’s disability.
Parents of kids with invisible disabilities are not just responsible for feeding, clothing, loving, disciplining, and teaching their kids. They must also advocate for their kids in a system that does not always have their best interests at heart.

Parenting is hard enough without adding other people’s assumptions to the equation. Parents of kids with invisible disabilities just want the world to know that it’s only okay to assume one thing: They and their kids are doing the best they can.

After all, human beings are not all cookie-cutter perfect nor the same. We all have different weaknesses and strengths. Therefore, instead of expecting everyone to fit the same mold, let’s look for each person’s individual, exceptional qualities and show them our admiration for their courage in the midst of their hurdles.

The post In”Visible” appeared first on Not So SuperMom VS Society.

What is occupational therapy?

Occupational therapy (OT) treatment focuses on helping people with a physical, sensory, or cognitive disability be as independent as possible in all areas of their lives. OT can help kids with various needs improve their cognitive, physical, sensory, and motor skills and enhance their self-esteem and sense of accomplishment.

Everett’s Therapy Routine

Everett receives OT 1 hour every Monday from Boost Kids (Shea). Shea has also helps him with feeding therapy and yoga. In addition to Boost Kids, he also receives 1.5 hours a week in therapy services from the local school system (speech, special ed, and OT).

A lot of what Everett’s therapy looks like is play. Which is pretty awesome, because a child’s most important job is playing after all. Everett needs extra help learning the appropriate skills and social interaction techniques to interact with other people.

Shea almost always starts Everett off with an obstacle course. This is one of Everett’s favorite things to do. He even pretends to make them at home (sometimes we do our own), or if we’re taking too long to start his session, he starts the course on his own! He loves his routines!

After the obstacle course they work on a variety of things from cutting skills to catching balls. They typically spend time working at the table (with things like drawing) and time working on more physical tasks. The physical tasks usually hit on a variety of areas, for example she’ll use a peanut ball and have him stretch to grab a puzzle piece with one hand and find it’s appropriate spot. She has him rotate his hands to work on motor planning, build muscle strength, and obviously the puzzle helps with more cognitive areas. Something you may not realize is that children with autism often have poor muscle tone, which leads to issues with balance in addition to limiting their fine/ gross motor skills. This is why the physical activities she provides are so important.

These types of activities that hone Everett’s fine and gross motor skills are really helping him to catch up to his peers.

When we started with therapy, Everett had issues with things like cutting, jumping, crab walking, and blowing bubbles. It wasn’t that he was incapable of learning it, he just lacked the motor planning capabilities. Over the last year he has grown leaps and bounds. He’s even crab walking on his own!

Shea just tested him for his yearly evaluation last week. He’s in a much higher percentile and scoring almost average in some categories! I’m so proud of him and his progress. Here are a few photos from his testing process. I loved being able to watch his skills and reasoning process.

Feeding Therapy

Here are a few photos from our feeding sessions.

When we do a feeding session, it’s always 30 minutes feeding and 30 minutes yoga. Feeding Everett is a challenge. He doesn’t eat most meats, veggies, and carbs. His diet is mostly hummus, guacamole, and fruit. We discontinued feeding therapy in the fall because we thought he was doing better and he was going to therapy right after school/lunch, so getting him to eat right away was tricky. Unfortunately, it’s starting to get worse again, so it’s looking like we’ll be starting up again soon.

Yoga

Boost Kids also offers children’s yoga classes. This is such a awesome thing. Yoga helps Everett strengthen his muscles, work on breathing skills, and he LOVES it! Every once in awhile, Everett will even request yoga during a regular OT session. Shea is awesome about accommodating his requests. One of the reasons why we love going to Shea is that she really goes out of her way to make Everett happy while still helping him achieve his therapy goals.

Yoga is truly one of Everett’s favorite things now. He brings his yoga pose knowledge home and loves working on various poses at home. His favorite is tree pose!

Home Therapy

The therapy doesn’t stop at those places either, we bring it home with us and utilize it when we can. One of the reasons we love Shea, aka Boost Kids, is that she’s willing to work with me to teach me strategies to use at home. We bring in a lot of equipment, especially from our favorite sensory shop, Fun & Function.

Here are some cool items that Shea has recently helped us with (all items can be found at Fun & Function):

Here is a weighted knot ball. Everett fell in love with this at Fun & Function HQ, and I asked Shea how to best use it for Everett. She showed me how to give him a workout with it, by having him lift it up and down a couple times and by throwing it back and forth. She also used it as a weighted lap pad while he did situps. She also suggested letting him hold it during screentime.

One of our favorites, is this compression roller. It almost instantly calms Everett down and it’s so fun to look at. In addition to rolling it across his body, he also rolls it across the floor when he does “push ups.”

Another favorite is this cool marble tracker. Everett likes to twist it into puzzles/knots and solve it. Shea recommended having Everett take lead here, limited only by his imagination!

Here we have sensory twists. This was one of the ones that stumped me. They looked fun and Everett liked squishing them, but I needed some fun activites to use them with. Shea set up little cones and let him bowl with them as well as toss them on the tops of the cones. It was such a fun game and easy to recreate at home, especially for our obstacle courses! She also said it could be a fun item for bathtub sensory integration, but we haven’t tried that yet.

We incorporate a lot into Everett’s home therapy, but we also have a lot of fun too. I try to make the activites fun, sensory friendly, and a learning opportunity. I’d love to talk more about our cool sensory stations and rad therapist, but alas, it’s bedtime and the wee beasties are definitely showing their inner monsters!

The post Benefits of Therapy appeared first on Not So SuperMom VS Society.

We get a lot of questions about where we buy our rad outfits, especially for our advocacy items, so I figured today was a perfect day to showcase some of our favorites! As an added bonus, some of the shops will be having sales today and/or donating to Autism positive organizations throughout the month.

Rockin Llama Co

This shop is one of my favorites. Her clothes are fun, edgy and punk rock-esque. The owner, Kristina Kenner is so open, accepting, and kind.

Today she is offering 40% of her proceeds towards ARC (the Autism Resource Center).

Se7entees

Se7entees is a shop that’s near and dear to my heart. Their entire brand promotes inclusivity and love. The owner, Shell Asselin has littles of her own that are special needs, and she truly understands the battles we encounter and the barriers we try to break down. She takes that passion and understanding gained from her personal experience and showers it into her business-and it shows!

Today they are offering 30٪ off of all purchases with code ACCEPTANCE.

Spill The Beans

Spill the Beans has always been an advocate for special needs groups. They strive to help minorities and individuals that are struggling with various donations, auctions, and specialty clothing. The owner, Brandy Decker, has worked in inclusion classrooms with special needs children and has developed a fondness for kiddos with extra needs.

Today they are having a sale, save 30% with code AU-SOME. They are also donating a portion of all the sales from their autism line to the Autism Society. If you miss today’s sale you can use code NOTSOSUPERMOM20 to save.

Wolfe & Scamp

Wolfe and Scamp Dino Hoodies are the BEST! I had a custom made for Everett when he turned 2 and it lasted us until this year (when he grew out of it- don’t worry it’s totally going to Finn!). So when I saw she was coming out with a Neurodiversity t-rex hoodie I was ALL ABOUT THAT!

The owner Hänni Baatz, has a kiddo on the spectrum and is a huge advocate for autism acceptance. 50% of sales from her neurodiversity hoodie will be donated and you can use code SUPERMOM to save sitewide.

The Pine Torch

This is a honorable mention as it’s next on the purchase list! As per their website:

In honor of our twins, we are holding a fundraiser with our Autism tees! For Autism Awareness month, we are donating ALL PROFITS from our Autism Fundraiser tees to Autism Speaks. All tees are discounted 40% off to make them affordable for families.

I hope you found something you love on this list and are able to take advantage of these Au-some deals! All the shops mentioned in today’s blog are small shops, which are the types of places I prefer to purchase our clothes from. However, if you seem some other fantastic advocacy tees, please drop a link in the comments! I’d love to check out other brands, small or large!

The post Buy All The Things! appeared first on Not So SuperMom VS Society.

Everett gets 1 hour of therapy with a trained therapist per week. We rotate biweekly between occupational therapy and feeding therapy/yoga. What does that mean? The other 167 hours in the week are ALL ME. Granted, he sleeps for part of that, so lets say approx 100 hrs a week, I’m focusing on what I need to do to balance Everett’s therapeutic needs with everything else, like Finn and my husband. I’m not going to lie, sometimes I lose sight of that bigger picture, but I’m working on stepping back and taking a breath when we get frustrated and overwhelmed.

After a lot of support from family, working with his therapist, and partnering with companies like Fun and Function and Ark Therapeutic, I’ve turned our house into a sensory friendly zone.

Everett’s Daily Routine:

• Wake up
• Eat breakfast
• Get dressed/Sensory Activity
• Go to school or on playdate/adventure (taking lots of sensory breaks if we are out)
• Lunch
• End playdate/ pickup from school
• Head home for nap or head to therapy (after school)
• Wake up
• Sensory activity
• Eat dinner
• Family time
• Bed time routine starts
• Books, books, and more books maybe songs then with luck, sleeping

Our routine isn’t as structured as it probably should be for Everett, but I do what I can to accommodate his needs while still keeping him in normal kid routines. We rarely spend days at home, so I bring Everett’s headphones/mp3 player with us, plan activities around breaks, and try to prepare him as much as possible. I also keep emergency fidgets in my bag (mostly chews from Ark Therapeutic and goodies from Fun and Function).

While we are out, I try to use the local environment as our sensory playground. We are fortunate to have many Kulture City kits at various places we frequent around town that we love utilizing. If you’re not familiar with Kulture City I highly suggest checking them out. They focus on providing organizations with tools to become sensory inclusive and they have an amazing app.

I also have Everett do crazy walks while we wait at places or give him challenges, like running ahead and seeing how quickly he can hop back and give me a high five. I take him to places at times when it isn’t crowded and during times that he can truly interact with his environment.

At home it’s a whole nother ballgame. We have a shelf of sensory activities that I cycle through on a daily basis.

We utilize a mix of homemade activities (slime, bubbles, painting etc), purchased items (swings, scooter board, hopper balls, etc), and music.

Our current favorite places for purchasing items are:

• Fun and Function
• Ark Therapeutic
• Sensor-bility
• Hearthsong
• Legacy Learning Academy

We use most of their products every week. I like to incorporate and mix things up. My favorite thing lately, is to set up mini obstacle courses. I do both indoor and outdoor, and although I try to make them slightly different each time, I tend to stick to certain things in each area. For example, our Hearthsong swing is outside, so of course that is always going to be part of the outdoor obstacle course. I also prefer to use our sensory bins outside due to the fact that they can be quite messy and Finn has a tendency to end up with little pieces of rice and beans! Indoors I almost always use our scooter from Fun and Function. We have the perfect length hallway to use it and it’s a lot safer than the road and easier to navigate than in the grass. I also tend to use our Legacy Learning Academy stuff inside, simply because I don’t want to loose pieces to our sets, and some require a table for writing. Other than that, I try to mix up our obstacle courses. I toss in fun stuff like puzzles, our hopper ball, a tunnel, a water mat, ball bouncing, and timed challenges. Unfortunately, I don’t have any obstacle course photos, but I will share a few photos of the various items we do utilize.

For sensory bins, I like to mix up different items, textures, and skill levels. I have made several of my own, but recently, Sensor-bility sent us one of theirs to try out. It was a bug kit that used a green rice base. I really liked it because it came with so much fun stuff. Everett spent almost an hour exploring all the different bugs and playing with all the various pieces that came in it! For the ones I make on my own, I use a dried rice and bean mixture or a dyed macaroni base. I then decide on a theme–for example, maybe our focus this week is on animals, so I select various animals and tailor the obstacle course around that. I hide animals in a mixture, then he has to pick an animal, do that animals walk to the bin, find the animal and make that animals sound until he deposits the animal in a color coded cupcake pan. Everett loves the fun challenges and I get to engage him on multiple levels.

I used to think it would be so hard and challenging to do all these activities, and I will be the first to admit I don’t always have it in me to do obstacle courses or special activities every day. His first therapist once told me “I bet you are doing more therapy at home than you realize” and she asked me a bit about our daily routine. She pointed out the simple things I did for Everett without even realizing it had therapeutic benefits. For example, when we are watching tv, I use a weighted lap pad or vest and a chew for Everett. When we are in the car, I keep a big bag of twizzlers in my console. (we call them chew sticks), and give Everett a fun way to give him oral input. When we are at the playground, him running around and climbing is sensory work too. He wears his Fun and Function dino cape when we go out and his body sock to hide in when he is overwhelmed. I give him back scratches and rubs and big squeezy hugs. I give him warnings about transitions and tell him a lot about what we are doing. All of those things help keep Everett level.

I’m no Autism/SPD saint. Everett still has frequent meltdowns (especially over potty training and sharing with his brother and sleeping and and and), but I do my best and really, that’s all anyone can ask, right?

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